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February 15, 2011

featured: {advice} by Chelsea

todays feature
isn't exactly a love story.
this is for all you single women!

introducing


she didn't send me an intro so i will write one for her :)
you probably recognize her from my blog a time or two.. or three.
we have been friends since i can remember.

chelsea is probably one of the strongest women i know. she loves to bake. cook. go on vacations. she knows more about sports than most men do. is not your typical girly girl. but pretty girly. she's hardworking.freaking funny. & she's going into nursing -wants to work in the ER. she's beautiful inside and out. and is always full of the best advice.

and now onto that advice.. for you.. and me!


Relationships... Love... Marriage... Happily every after... Does anyone actually understand any of these concepts? I surely don't but I do know a few things.


I am 22, divorced, and the happiest single person you will ever meet. I have experienced love, relationships and complete happiness in them. Relationships are amazing there is no doubt about that. However I don't rely on a relationship or love from anyone else to be happy. I have a choice to be happy and I carry that happiness with me wherever I go.


{chel w/ the kids she used to nanny for}


I loved my ex husband, when I divorced him I felt like a complete failure. I loved my ex boyfriend with all my heart. I recently lost him and when I lost Chase I honesty wondered if I would ever be able to cope. I wondered if I would ever find that happiness in someone else again. It's been months and I haven't found someone I feel the way I felt about Chase, It's ok though.




I spent some time feelings sorry for myself. I spent time hurting over losing him. I spent time feeling inadequate. I sat there wondering how I just screwed up another relationship. I questioned my self worth and why I wasn't worth it to Chase. It never comes down to that though.. Through dating and experiences lately I am confident in my single hood so to speak.



Sometimes especially at this time of year I think girls feel sorry for theme selves for not being in a relationship. They question their self worth or their genuine goodness because they are not with "the one". If I can give one piece of advice at this time of year...



Love yourself completely! You will be so much happier in any relationship if you do just that. Once you are confident in yourself, you can give yourself to someone else completely. I believe that there are blessings, experiences and knowledge to be gained through being single. You learn to push yourself, to challenge yourself. You learn who you are. You learn to develop your strengths. You gain experience and gain new talents through those experiences that you wouldn't receive otherwise. You will be happier in a relationship if you are confident in who you are and what you want.



I am a better person today after my divorce. I am a better person today because I lost Chase. I have learned valuable lessons from each relationship, things I will continue to take with me into any relationship. But as a single girl, I don't sit around feeling sorry for myself. I don't base my happiness on someone else and I would encourage the same in anyone who is single.



Put a smile on your face, be confident and optimistic. Stop looking for Mr. Right, and just love yourself right now! Exactly as you are! When you learn to stop looking and just love yourself guys come in faster than you know what to do with. I speak from experience...!! It's exhausting at times..




Learn to love being single, but be ready when Mr. Right comes into your life. Each of us gets a once upon a time, and a happily ever after. Each of us is the writer of our own story. Each failed relationship or setback is just a chapter in our novel. Never be afraid that you won't get that. Just have faith and trust and live your life in such a way that you deserve that person when they come into your life. Be the person you would want to fall in love with. Love will find you. It's just a matter of time....

hope you all had a great valentines!


Love You,
Chelsea Phoebe
 
 
thanks chel!
i think sometimes we all need
to be reminded of this!!
 
xoxo

4 comments

Amanda said...

Thank you for the insights. They were much needed today

Ash Att said...

this was great!

Stacylyn said...

Amen sister. I find this to be a huge issue among my single friends. I swear once we stop focusing on "finding someone" we NATURALLY do. I love that. Thanks for sharing.

Samantha said...

love this :)

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